These Lagos Night Crawlers
Working late one night, at about 10:20pm, in Victoria Island where my office is. I decided to stroll down to an eatery as it was running late and I had to hurriedly catch up with the most likely restaurant that would be open at that ungodly hour of the night. I headed for Mama Cass restaurant, on Ajose Adeogun street, Victoria Island – so that my bele no go give me trouble for night. I made for the street and walked the walk. As I made my way out of Amodu Tijani Close into Sanusi Fafunwa street, a car immediately pulled over to drop off this girl…she looked so unkempt and disgustingly uninteresting for a woman. Mpshewwwww! A thought ran through my mind – “ Ashi ni”, translated as “She’s a prostitute”. I continued on my quest to sort my already raging bowel worms (Ascaris) out – I couldn’t wait any longer to eat and go back to work. After which I would have my deserved sleep.
As if it was not enough that she looked so shabbily and unappealing for a man of my caliber. My humble self; Beammie Alhaji, a.k.a. Shygunusng, a.k.a. Professor. Initially, I started hearing an indistinct voice speaking behind me, as if to be in a conversation. Then, the voice became clearer as the ‘Ashi’ walked closer in a pace that I didn’t understand. She must have been walking at a faster pace of 1.5 measure of my own pace. Listening for clarity, as I did not want to turn, stare and observe closely what was happening, I could hear that voice more clearly now. She was seriously yarning, but in a way that shows her intentions to be more of psyching than thinking out loud to my hearing…”yaaaay, fine boy. Na this kind boys I dey like. Fresh blood. Clean shave. Baby” – Yaaay pa! Na me this one dey call “Baby”? As if say na she breastfeed me from small or…maybe she wanted that kinda job. Hehe….You know that “Surrogate mother” kind of sh!t…and now that I am all grown up . She continued again; “Come and talk to me naaa!”, in a dialect figured to be a serious “Waffi” side type; talking as if she had licked some “JAZZ” before elaving her dungeon and like she was sure of her “JAZZ”. Say the scoping go catch me. Shege! She no sabi say me sef be pastor pikin. I managed to increase my pace to about 3 measures; about double her pace, so that I could walk further away from her so that her evil communications would not corrupt my ‘small good manners’ wey I still dey try to manage to improve on.
In all of this, I started thinking of some other fine chics that I used to see hanging all around that axis; Sanusi Fafunwa, Adeola Hopwell end of Ozumba Mbadiwe. Ehen! Law School side, to be precise. Adeyemo Alakija and Idowu Taylor streets. These girls would have been better if they could use their time, innate skills and bodies for something more productive for the development of the country, rather than just to pervert our men whose wives have gone through so much but for some reasons beyond their control, couldn’t keep their men within the boundaries of their love.
I do hope these girls just engage in some sort of production that could benefit the country, rather than mar the reputation of the country, rather than mar the reputation of the country. Though, this trade has been in existence for long a time and is widely practiced throughout, or perhaps in most countries of, the world too. But, all these can stop and every man would have that sense of loyalty to their women again. These things even are dangerous to our partners. Make we try put an end to this, for the benefit of all stake holders.
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